Wednesday, 27 August 2014
Eleven Months Post Transplant
This weekend it will be eleven months since I had my heart and double lung transplant. The last few weeks have been lovely and peaceful and hospital free and we have been able to have our usual summer holiday in the Lake District.
We usually holiday here for a few weeks every August and although the last four or so years have been challenging ones we have somehow always managed to get away. It never mattered how limited I was, we've always tried to enjoy ourselves and just adapt what we did to what I could cope with. I'd accepted really that I was ill and was trying to deal with it as best I could. Having a transplant was always a light shining on the horizon, but it always felt after waiting so long that it would always just stay shining out on the horizon and wouldn't come to me. The future was so uncertain.
This year's summer holiday has been extra special though, as I am well again now and it is hard to believe after all that's happened that I'm suddenly well again and I'm able to do all those things I used to do before I was ill. I think of all those recent previous years and I never really ever knew deep down that I would be able to go for long walks again or simply just wake up feeling well or have the energy to stay out for hours on end when it's a gorgeous summer's day. I'd resigned myself to the fact that I'd probably not get better.
I didn't ever even allow myself to dare hope that I may get better, although I wished for it at times. I was scared of being disappointed and thought it better to make the best of how things were at the moment in case my health deteriorated even more. There were also heavy risks involved with having a transplant, so the future always felt daunting and it was better not to think of how things may turn out, so I tried not to and tried hard to live in the moment.
That is why the holiday this August was so special, after all that has happened since last August, it is incredible how things have worked out and after years of struggling health wise, to feel well again feels nothing short of a miracle.
Every day feeling well is a bonus.
We have been able to enjoy ourselves properly and spend some wonderful time with family and friends. My family and I are still in awe of what has happened and we think often of my donor and their family and the new chances in life that they have given to our family.
Coffee at the Swan Hotel by the river Leven at Newby Bridge.
Early evening on Ullswater